My fiancee (if you've been paying attention to the promotion that I'm
offering, then you'll know she's only my fiancee for one month longer)
found this article and found it interesting: 9 Lies We Have to Stop Telling About Sex Workers. I find it interesting, too, and so am commenting on it a little.
First
of all, this article is about prostitutes. The author, as far as I can
tell, is what I call a high-end prostitute, and therefore doesn't
really deserve the term of prostitute. We generally think of
prostitutes as people who stand out on the corner of a street and wait
for clients. Many prostitutes do that, but many prostitutes do not.
Those who do stand out on the street offering themselves up for sale are
the definition of a prostitute: from the Latin for exposing and
offering up for sale. That is what the word means and it sums up what
is going on quite well. There are others, though, who put themselves
out there, advertise and sell themselves with far more agency. What the
author of the article says applies to these sex workers more readily
than it does to the stereotypical prostitute. A high-end sex worker
does have freedom, agency, and can earn a significant amount of money
(shouldn't be surprising considering how desperately our cultures are
wrapped up in sex). With that said, this article is not about sex
workers who are not working, who are forced into what they do. What
this author says about human trafficking in the article is
understandable, but a little misguided: if you are not in the world of
human trafficking, how can you properly use your experience as a
measure? Can I truly say, "Human trafficking isn't a problem where I
live because I haven't met a single slave"? No, I can't; I know
human trafficking is out there, and I will find it if I look hard
enough. Indeed, my fiancee and I found it just a few weeks ago and we
weren't even looking very intently. This author's experience with a
certain form of sex work should not suddenly derail all the hard work
people are putting into making us aware of how massive human trafficking
is.
Before going any further, I do want to say
that the general tone of this article is appropriate and much needed.
Sex workers, pornographic actors, and of course sex slaves, are all
human beings. Sex workers have lives with meaning, the same as all of
us. Sex workers have the right to choose and make a living how they see
fit, the same as all of us. This is a good and necessary reminder.
Often we get so caught up in talk of human trafficking and forget that
we are talking about human beings; often we make philosophical decisions
on pornography and prostitution and forget that we are talking about
human beings. At the heart of what we are doing is, or should be, the
concept of full living: we are working to provide a full life to all
people everywhere; not a life that is diminished or degraded by slavery
or by the lack of appropriate choices.
While I
appreciate this article (especially No. 9, since the same could be true
for slavery), it's my last phrase that catches me up: we do not want
anyone having to live a life diminished or degraded by the lack of appropriate choices.
Yes, sex work can be work, but then what does that mean? Can we really
separate out "good" sex work from "bad" sex work that is degrading or
under the umbrella of slavery? Should we be okay with sex work, knowing
that for at least some it is a choice of last resort, of only resort? Should we be okay with sex work, knowing that for at least some it
will be degrading and will mean that they can never find work that they
feel is meaningful? Or, perhaps more importantly, should we be okay
with sex work, knowing that it's very existence and propagation are
signs that our society is desperate for sex, meaning that our society
survives without a center, without meaning, without sustained
confidence, and without hope? If we respond "yes" to this last
question, or respond to this last question by saying, "hey, your
question is misleading!" then we must also be okay with the fact that
sex work leads to slavery, for it is in our cultural blood to want what
we want at the cheapest cost, at the least effort; and if pornography or
high-end sex workers are out there offering us more and more of what we
want, then eventually we will find what we want for less, for the
cheapest: slavery.
At the beginning of the cycle that
takes us to slavery is the lack of appropriate choices. We must be able
to create a world where people can find meaning and joy and hope
without having to turn to sex. The Isla Vista killer, Elliot Rodger,
could not do that and so turned his rage on those that he perceived to
be robbing him of his destiny. Well, how great would it have been if he
could see that women are not his playthings, that women are not around
for his enjoyment? How great would it have been if he could have found
meaning without sex? How great would it have been if he could have
found meaning on his own? Not all men are like Rodger, yes, but our
culture breeds men (and women) like Rodger, who are incapable of finding
meaning without sex, without power, without money. There must be more
opportunities out there, there must be a greater standard of living for
all people so that we can spend more time on ourselves and being okay
with ourselves. Until that happens, the reality of Rodger and other men
like him--indeed, the reality of slavery will haunt us.
Folks,
we live in a world where slavery, in this case particularly sex
trafficking, and fools like Elliot Rodger exist because we cannot come
to grips with one simple fact: we are lost. The #YesAllWomen hashtag is
necessary because we are lost; I'd even go so far as to say the unique
perspective in my book, 27 Million Revolutions for 27 Million Slaves,
is necessary because we are lost. And those who are so-called good
people refuse to see how they are contributing to our cultural lost-ness
by not doing anything. Our very attitudes must change. Sex
should not be such a desperate goal, whether we are inclined to
pornography, prostitutes, high-end sex workers, or murderous
intentions. Sex will not save us, no matter how much Rodger may have
thought so, no matter how much those who knowingly and unknowingly
contribute to slavery may think so; only God can save us. And if we
don't believe in God, then only we can save ourselves.
Changing our attitudes toward sex and love (and power) while simultaneously putting an end to slavery and all related activities
are urgent tasks. There are human beings out there who are crying out
for our help, and there are many women and men that we can preemptively
save from bewildered idiots like Rodger.
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